Sometimes something, some truth, some realisation just hits you, and in that moment, you feel a sort of one-ness with yourself, or with someone else, but in that moment of understanding you are invincible, for a split second. That feeling pulses through you and you feel undefeatable. That humanity and comprehension never lasts. You are there with it, comfortable for a moment- or maybe longer, and then it goes away with some facts, some cynicism, some more truth. Too much of a good thing is never... a good thing. Two wrongs don't make a right, two truths, do they make a cynic?
Loss is a strange thing. It comes from nowhere, it sneaks up and punches you in the chest, but from the inside. You can never feel that pain. The emotional pain, a kind of physical one that ice packs and hot water bottles will never cure. Its like an open wound. It empties you, makes you weak- right in the chest. A limp pain that burns like onions in your eyes. Like someone opened your chest and took out your heart and replaced it with an onion.
Sometimes it makes you cry, and others, it feels as though there is an onion where your heart should be. Thats real pain. You can't forget it. It haunts you at unlikely times. It jumps you when you were minding your own business. Its like a slap across the face from a stranger in the road, but most of all its like an onion. An onion you can't pick and put away.
It will sate your hunger, but you can't reach it.
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